the cool thing about transitioning is men, cis, trans, queer and otherwise and a nonzero amount of women too all just sorta stopped caring about my opinion as much the second they learned it was coming out of a woman and not a man

but holy shit do i have as many opportunities to say "i told you so" after the fact as i could ever want, and that's very satisfying

my transfemme superpower is when dudes are treating me worse because i'm a woman now i know exactly when it happens and i know exactly how to twist the knife to make them feel real fuckin awkward about it

i've also hit the "over this shit" threshold where if i'm more and more popular with cis women because if i'm in earshot of them getting talked over i'll just barge in like YOU KNOW I THINK SHE'S RIGHT ACTUALLY and be as annoying as it takes

trans women are dangerous because we're the women who men accidentally showed how men get treated

and we're all too tired to keep quiet about it anymore

also hot take if you're a trans queer ideal leftist and you think you're exempt and haven't made the effort, you're actually probably just as bad about not listening to women or expecting them to do ten times the work to convince you of something a man could do with a passing comment

everyone has to do the work, you're not exempt you're just insufferable

this includes cis and trans women

everyone is taught that women are lesser and everyone needs to make the effort to listen to the women around them and give them the same good faith they give male opinions

if you are a woman, this includes making an effort to take your own feelings and opinions in good faith in spite of being trained to ignore and devalue yourself


outing myself as an insufferable nerd, but there was a 4-5 month period where i was like "i'm imagining it, i must be crazy" and i just straight up kept track on a SPREADSHEET, i swear to god i had a little number clicker

women around me got interrupted ~2x as much as men

i get interrupted ~3-4x as much as after i came out as transfemme

women and people i knew to be trans-friendly had no significant difference from men as a whole

everyone has to work on it, it's a cultural pressure

this might seem like an excessive approach but friends who know i have an auditory processing disorder where being interrupted midsentence is, for me, only slightly less unpleasant than being punched in the face might understand why i felt like spending the energy to quantify it

@kat you're right and you should say it like this.

@kat Somewhat related but you outed yourself yesterday with the ff14 lore thread

@kat I remember the first time I was working in software and finally started noticing this.
One girl in particular was working very hard the be firm and put her foot down and be taken seriously. She was probably the second most experienced person on the team, but the tone of the questions she got was just different enough that I noticed.

Nevermind the other girl who was clearly more tired of pushing back. Sometimes I could tell she wanted to tell some of us to "eat shit, do it yourself then."

@kat It's *excellent* that you made the spreadsheet ... I think that's brilliant.

Calling @Chartodon ...

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