a lot of people put "autistic person overexplains something" in the same bucket as mansplaining because they don't really care to differentiate and it's amazingly efficient at being both ableist and triple shitty to autistic trans women
@kat This shit kept me in the closet for years, *thank you* for managing to put it better than I ever have.
@kat as bad as it is to be treated like an idiot, would be super fucking fantastic if there were a hint of good faith around "you asked for help and I didn't know your knowledge level" or "I made a comment on something I know some about not realizing you're an expert"
or just, like, not every interaction with a stranger of indeterminate gender is mansplaining
You've got me curious, because I don't think that one was even on my radar until a couple of years ago. How is it being misapplied compared to when it first became known? (Thanks.)
@xenophora There's a couple of parallel things going on with it, where 1) the definition has been broadened to *all* situations where one person pays attention to someone else in a familiar-but-not-personal way, and 2) it's Been Decided that all parasocial relationships are inherently bad/toxic and not that "parasocial" is just an adjective that refers to a kind of one-way relationship that folks need to be more mindful of.
Belated thanks for the links and comment. (Work is kicking my ass right now or I would've responded sooner.)
@kat wow. That's gross and just reinforces the misogyny/ transmisogyny already rampant in medicine when the more likely culprit is that autism is underdiagnosed in women just like ADHD bc we present differently.
gah I hate this
@kat the fun part here being, of course, is that trans men are gatekept when theyre autistic but for completely other bullshit reasons
@kat I am extremely glad that I didn’t get my autism diagnosis until I was 13 years post-transition and the medcops couldn’t touch me any more.
Totally agreed. It's also horribly ableist because they're missing that mainsplaining tends to be ignorant and wrong, whereas autistic infodumps are fascinating treasure troves of deep analysis and experience.
@kat yeah "mansplaining" has kinda semantic drifted hard from "man explaining something a woman already knows" to "anyone that i can get away with calling a man explaining anything in a way I don't like" and i really hate it
@kat Wait is that kind of infodump an autistic thing? Like, how are people supposed to know what others do or don't already know???
to the first, yes it's typically associated with being autistic
to the second, people just kinda assume the other person has the relevant background and that contributes to an enormous amount of misunderstandings and we just kinda live with that somehow
@kat that sounds like throwing manspreading and wheelchair access in the same bucket because they both take up extra room
@lanodan i get where you're coming from but also the whole "men obviously can't know about birth control" thing kinda excludes trans dudes i think
@lanodan iunno if it's a super okay dichotomy to make regardless of whether it applies in the specific circumstance tbh
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